I'd like to show you a million things

My neighborhood café is the shit. I love that I can walk 3 blocks and get good coffee, 24 beers on tap*, a stylish and unpretentious atmosphere, and wireless. Fuck yes. Sure, their baked goods are crap and the food is overpriced, but who cares? I'm here for fluids and radiation, and they deliver in spades.

Plus, lots of singer-songwriter type concerts, though I tend to not actually pony up for those.

Anyway, since I'm reliant on cafés for my internet access right now, I've also been exploring other places nearby. (Because it's nice to be a regular, but showing up every single day seems kind of desperate.) Here are my reviews:

• Muddy Waters, a block south of the Wedge: Rampantly hip, with baristas who clearly don't give a shit about anything. (Which, according to that TAL episode**, means they probably kill in tips.) Coffee is so-so. But they've got a TV that's always on, which is totally irritating.
• Caffitto? Or something like that? Just west of Humm's Liquor Store. Stylish 2 THA MAXX. All the tables are laquered-over clippings from old children's books and magazines and stuff, and half the seats are couches and easychairs, and they've got outside seating, and this woman had her dog in there and was feeding it a muffin, and everyone seems to know each other and they all have good haircuts, and there's art on the walls. I don't know what the usual brew is like, since I had iced coffee and it's hard to completely botch that since it numbs your tongue out anyhow. Minuses: No visible bathroom? WTF.
• The Urban Bean, on Bryant somewhere south of Lake. Uncute and with an irritating atmosphere. It's not enough to just buy a bunch of chrome, you guys. I ordered iced tea.
• This one place way south of Lake and I think west of Nicollet, like on 43rd or something, I forget the name, I was out there when I was garage-saleing. I liked it!

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* Current favorite: Singletrack Copper Ale. A fabulous, unabashedly beer-flavored beer.
** "The allure of the mean friend," or something.