roadrunnertwice | Keep the burrito on the plate

So a few weeks ago, I hit the library and picked up that book that Found Magazine put out, and it's been living in the bathroom. Anyway, there's this one find in it that's been haunting me, and every time I think of it, I start laughing like a damned hyena, without quite knowing why.

It's a large message—a sign, really—scrawled on a piece of notebook filler paper. The writer only had a ballpoint pen at hand, so he had to make a dozen scratches for each letter to get it dark enough, which gives it a frantic, urgent quality. The message reads, in toto:

IT STAYED ON THE GRILL, BITCH!!

And of course, they paired it with a photo of some towheaded seven-year-old tending pancakes on an electric griddle, but the trademark Found kismet humor is kind of an anticlimax at that point. I mean, what? I keep running through all the possible semantic meanings I can think of for that message, and every one of them spectacularly fails to explain why it exists. I feel like it's some kind of kōan, a test; truly, he who seeks enlightenment must strive to keep it on the grill. Bitch.